A bit of perspective for your day…

I could write about how things are going. I could tell you all that my tent is now without A/C and how hot it is here. I could tell you that my LSAT prep course is going well. I could tell you about the books I have read recently. I could tell you about my daily activities but I will save all of that for another day. Today I want to give you a bit of perspective as I see things.

As I write this two Marines are sitting in the hospital here after they had both of their legs blown off. A Marine was killed a few days ago, and another one lost his eye.

Also, there is a woman waking her children up preparing them for another day doing what most average American mother does on a daily basis. She is living her life as she has done every day, except today she lives out the fourth anniversary of the death of her husband. Four years ago her world came crashing down around her. Her husband was serving with me in Ramadi back when it was a bad place to be. He was killed during combat operations and he died leading his men. But, that was four years ago and to most of the world it is just any other day, like any other. But to some of us, this day is a reminder of priority, or perspective, and a reminder about focus…
To this woman, this day is about re-opening the wounds she has tried to heal for four years. She tried to carry on day by day by herself. I have no idea how she finds the strength each morning to even get out of bed, but she is a strong and courageous woman who lives her life for her children and in her husband’s memory. I have no idea, how she manages to carry on with her life, but like I said, she is strong. I wish I was that strong and that brave.

But her husband was not the only husband/father to be killed four years ago. On that same day, another good man was killed. And so today, another woman is out there struggling to make it through the next 24 hours. She too will struggle with how to raise her children without her helper and partner. She struggles with knowing that her children will never know their father. They will never know that man he was. They will never be tucked in at night by him, they will never hear another bed time story from him. She struggles with the questions from these youngsters of “where’s daddy”, “why isn’t daddy coming home” and the dreaded “daddy who?”.

It tears me up inside to think that some how for some unknown reason my life was spared and these men’s lives were not. How many times was my life in the crosshairs and why is it that I made it back alive. Why was I so fortunate enough to get to see my beautiful wife face again, to see my family again, to get to be given this gift of life…

While I have no answer to these questions, I try not to let these questions go too far from my mind. I try NOT to forget about these two women who have gone these past four years hurting. I try not to forget about those Marines that are awakening this morning to the realization that it wasn’t just a bad dream; they don’t have legs anymore. I try not to forget that you don’t have to be in a combat zone to remember that each day you wake up is a glorious day, a day to be lived vigorously, a day to smile and a day to thank God for.

I am not sure what is going on in your life or what struggle you face each day. I know times are hard and anyone’s future is uncertain. But no matter how shitty your day is, I suggest you get down on your knees and thank your God you still have knees to get down on. You thank your God that you are alive and privileged enough to have shitty days. The sun is shining or the sky is dark and dreary, either way you are alive to experience it and there are many people I used to know personally that no longer have that privilege. Remember these men and these women today. Take a few moments to hug and kiss your children more than you normally do. Call your parents and tell them you love them. Don’t let the sun go down today without telling everyone important in your life that they are important in your life. You may not be lucky enough to get tomorrow. Or worse they might not be lucky enough.

Now some of you may be thinking that the story of those two women sound familiar but a newer version than the story you remember. You may be thinking I know a woman like that, or maybe you are thinking I know children like that. For those of you who know this pain on a personal level let me just say I admire your strength. I admire your ability to have gotten past those dark days. I admire your courage to go on. I do not know how you did it or how you continue to do it today. You are a stronger person than I am, and I am humbled by you.

Let me close this with this:
Wifey… I love you so much. I am a horrible husband to you and I am utterly selfish. You deserve so much better in life but never forget that I love you and I consider myself blessed to have you in my life. You are the greatest gift I have ever received. It will be October before you know it. Stay strong. I love you.

Mom and Dad, I love you and I am sorry for being a punk ass kid (even still).

Kat and Lu - you are my people. I love you both as my sisters and my friends. I have learned so much from both of you and am eternally grateful to be your little brother.

To everyone else, family and friends - I love you all. Never forget that and never doubt it.

To anyone else who might have just stumbled across my blog, know that there are people out here manning the wall who care enough about you to put their lives on the line. Never forget the sacrifice that we are making for you. You don’t have to agree with the politics of war, but never miss an opportunity to thank the men fighting this war and the loved one staying strong back home. You owe us more than you can ever repay, but you can begin with your gratitude.

This isn’t a goodbye any means, I am still here and will still continue to be. Don’t worry about me as I am still safe and will continue to be smart. I now have a rifle and ammo, in addition to the pistol I sleep with at night.

This isn't goodbye just simply a reminder that life is bigger than we can comprehend. It is too big and too valuable to fathom. I wanted to remind you of how precious life is and to remind you to be grateful for this day and for the next. Get down on your knees in gratitude and live this day like it was your last.

I love you all...
ARSM

Part two...

Ah yes, the guitar came in. I am not much of a guitar player and only play around. I’m no rock star except when it comes to rock band then I am awesome. But I know how most people seem to play a little and seem to enjoy guitars. So I went online to find the cheapest guitar I could find. My plan was to buy a guitar put it in my guitar case and mail it out to Afghanistan, take it out of the case, mail the empty case home and the guitar will stay here forever. I am planning on giving it away when it comes time for me to leave here. As few guitars there are in country, I figured it would be a good thing to leave here once/if I finally got it here. Well when it came in the mail to our house in FL, it was packaged so good that I decided to leave it in the box, cross out the label and have the wifey mail it in the box. Well once I figured out what my mailing address was, she mailed it out here and it finally arrived. Yeah. I have it hanging up in the office here and when people see it, they light up and ask if it is mine. It is with pride that I tell them yes and they are amazed that I was able to get one over here. But, for the right price you can get anything over here. Well for around $200 I got a guitar, strings, a tuner and a soft sided case shipped all the way to Afghanistan. Not a bad deal, for not too bad a guitar. A very fun treat and I have told people the guitar is community property, so sometimes while I am working I can hear someone in the back of the tent strumming away at some song. I am sure they sound good in their own mind, just as I do.

No more t-shirts…There is an ongoing debate amongst the Infantry side of the house between the junior officers and the senior enlisted. I believe there to be a rule saying a Marine must wear an undershirt under their cammie top, but many junior officers think it is cooler (temperature wise) to not wear a t-shirt, so they don’t. This only serves to upset the senior enlisted Marines even more. Well with the raising heat index I thought I would try it out. So I stopped wearing the under shirt and put the cammie top on by itself. What a difference it made. Now a breeze or an A/C vent blows directly on my skin and feels great. When there is no air flow or A/C vent I just sweat which is no different than when I did wear a t-shirt. I now change my cammies more regularly and I have fallen in love with gold bond powder. There is no place gold bond powder doesn’t go. I bathe in it. Head to toe;, the stuff is powdered gold. I have bought some at the PX, but got most of my supply of the addictive white powder from the Chaplain’s office. I guess many churches have mailed in toiletries for distribution by the Chaplain’s office. Bonus for me.

My new pet peeve… ok picture if you will porta johns being the better alternative for bathroom facilities as compared to the bathrooms with plumbing. The porta johns are bigger (size wise) and if you go at night much cooler (temperature). The “indoor” plumbing toilets here are cramped. I’m not that big of a guy but my knees hit the wall when I sit on the toilet. And I have to change my clothes before I go into the bathroom because there is not enough room in the tiny stall to bother with unnecessary clothing. So I have to go to my tent, put on shorts and a t-shirt and then go to the bathroom. So trust me, the porta johns are the better choice. Anyways, the pet peeve is when people don’t put the toilet lid down after using the facilities. I drink 8 liters of water a day (yes, that’s four 2 liter bottles) and subsequently have to pee often. How much worse is a porta john when someone leaves the lid up. I am in there to pee and I must confront the mystery blue water of death. Why can’t people just put the lid down. Now don’t confuse this with the age long debate of putting the toilet SEAT down. No this is more. The toilet lid keeps odors and other things at a minimum…putting the seat down would do nothing for me in my battle against offenders of the porta john rules. Just like in a normal bathroom there is etiquette for guys on which urinal to use and how to use it. Never use a urinal next to another man and NEVER look at the guy next to you and talk only if absolutely necessary. Examples of necessary conversation include but not limited to: you are on fire, there is a guy with a chain saw and a hockey mask behind you, and the earth is about to get hit by a giant asteroid unless Ben Afleck can save the day…run for your life. No where in there is: what time is, nice day we’re having, so how bout that Obama guy… these type of conversation starters must be saved for the hand washing station. But I digress… Put the toilet lid down in a porta john. It is just common courtesy people!

ARSM out